so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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