i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
