Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
