Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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