I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize