You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
NoShamevember. You game?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
