herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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