So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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