Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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