I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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