Is it normal to miss your booty call?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
im six kinds of drunk right now
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
