wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Fuck appropriateness.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
