its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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