He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
