gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
