Whod you bang
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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