That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
