hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
