just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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