plz talk dirty to me
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Well I just put wine in my tea
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
