Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I know her cup size but not her name....
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
