North Korea, Best Korea!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
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