I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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