Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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