I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
