that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
cat food counts as protein by the way
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
