We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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