I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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