Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
