I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
50% drunk capacity currently
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
