It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
