he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
