have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
