Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
