But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
