Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
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