OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize
