i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize
