am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
