I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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