I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
