I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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