Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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