so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
bring money and cleavage
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
You left your phone here
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