Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize