yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize