you're like a bully in the Christmas story
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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