he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
