so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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