I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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